[personal profile] docwebster
David Letterman presents:

Top Ten Bush Goals For His Second Term

10. Fewer idiotic remarks; more hilarious pratfalls.

9. Add mother Barbara to Mount Rushmore.

8. Combine Nebraska and Kansas into new state: Nebransas.

7. Spice up boring state dinners with tasty fish sticks!

6. Improve communication skills from poor to fair.

5. Catch up on his "Smokey And The Bandit" collection.

4. Get Ray Stevens to write some funny lyrics for "Hail To The Chief"

3. Ride every roller coaster in the country.

2. Install remote-activated button in Oval Office so he can blow stuff up right from his desk!

1. Begin vote-rigging process for Jeb's White House run in 2008.

Date: 2005-01-25 04:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bassbone.livejournal.com
Hell, if I were president I'd give number three a shot.

Date: 2005-01-25 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] docwebster.livejournal.com
Hell, yeah.

Do yourself a very large favor if you ever ride The Beast at King's Island - do NOT eat anything before you go on that rollercoaster. Oy..

Date: 2005-01-25 04:45 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bassbone.livejournal.com
I have the iron stomach, dood.

I've ridden Mad Mice after eating giant chili dogs.

Date: 2005-01-25 01:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] otherbill.livejournal.com
The Beast is one of my favorite roller coasters; my wife and I had annual passes to KI one summer before Michael was born. Pity we live so far away from it now.

Date: 2005-01-25 04:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foxsynergy.livejournal.com
I'd give number two a shot! But then again, Bush would be on the receiving end of the button.

Date: 2005-01-25 04:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lbcboy232.livejournal.com
bwhahahahaha

Date: 2005-01-25 04:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foxsynergy.livejournal.com

1. Begin vote-rigging process for Jeb's White House run in 2008.


Now that is a frightening thought.

Date: 2005-01-25 01:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] otherbill.livejournal.com
You mean you don't really think they've started? :-/

Date: 2005-01-25 06:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] president-dubya.livejournal.com
That is correct. The tsunami was engineered so that Colin and Jeb could have a handshaking session. Still, that's top secret information. We're gonna have to kill you both.

Date: 2005-01-25 12:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadowcat48li.livejournal.com
nah... ask Wierd Al to write new lyrics to Hail to the Chief

Date: 2005-01-25 12:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shadowcat48li.livejournal.com
better yet, we need truth in advertising, replace Hail to the Chief with The Imperial March from Star Wars, with shrubs rep as an evil overlord etc... it would be more fitting

Date: 2005-01-25 05:12 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gridlore.livejournal.com
http://www.livejournal.com/users/gridlore/172165.html
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